Beasts avoid the dangers which they see, and when they have escaped them are free from care; but we men torment ourselves over that which is to come as well as over that which is past. Many of our blessings bring bane to us; for memory recalls the tortures of fear, while foresight anticipates them. The present alone can make no man wretched.
~Letters from a Stoic, Seneca
“Enjoy this phase because it doesn’t last forever,” says every well-meaning empty nester when my kids are acting like the Tasmanian Devil after four shots of espresso. They’re right. I know they’re right. In that moment, however, I wish they would just shut the heck up.
One of the good things about social media is also one of the bad things: it stays around forever. Well, at least until the power grid goes off line, and we have to learn how to live like early man just to survive. But, as we all know, that’s not going to happen until at least 2381 once the robotic overlords take over. Anyway, I was actually going somewhere with this.
I don’t do it everyday, but I will look back on my Facebook memories from time to time, and I see the faces of somebody’s kids; kids that have grown up a lot in just two or three years that look a lot like smaller versions of the ones currently living in my house.
In the fall, both of our kids will be in elementary school with the younger one starting kindergarten. There’s a part of me that’s looking forward to not having to worry about childcare or running back and forth to preschool in the middle of the day. But, I also realize that they are growing up.
I sit in the chair with both of them in my lap, and watch a movie together. As much as they still try it from time to time, there just isn’t room anymore. My oldest is getting to the point where it’s really not comfortable for her to sit on my lap, but I don’t dare tell her to stop. I’m going to let her as long as she wants. I’m going to enjoy the present moment for as long as I can.
She and I had a conversation the other morning about growing up and advancing through school. She was sad about going into second grade next year, and that her brother was going to be done with preschool soon. Then she said that the next year, she would be in third grade while her brother was in first, and there wouldn’t be any Swisher kids in kindergarten anymore. This conversation went through all the grade levels until both of them were in middle school, and there wouldn’t be any in their elementary school anymore.
The passage of time is weird. We remember the past, but we can’t relive it. We think about the future, but we never really get there. All we have is the present, and too often we’re too preoccupied with either the past or future to do anything with it.
So, allow me to suggest, as Dead Poets Society reminds us, carpe diem. Enjoy the time you have now. It’s all you really get.
Pastor Swish - Life, Ministry, and Other Stuff 